DOUGLAS OLSON — Freak show #9


Freak show #9



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Words have consequences

After the St. Louis Post-Dispatch devoted a whole page to trashing the Republican majority in the Missouri House of Representatives, and editorially condemned it as the "House of Hypocrites," that chamber voted to eliminate a state-tax exemption for newspapers with at least $250 million in annual operating revenue and a circulation of 200,000. The measure would affect only the Post-Dispatch and the Kansas City Star, which now escape more than $1 million a year in sales taxes.

The House Speaker said sponsor Richard Byrd (R) had approached her about the amendment before the editorial ran. Byrd defended the action as "closing corporate tax loopholes," which Democratic organs — such as the Post-Dispatch — always favor for other large business entities.

Once slander, now flattery

A federal judge in Boston has ruled that calling someone a homosexual can no longer be considered slander or libel. According to enlightened U.S. District Judge Nancy Gertner, "In 2004, a statement implying that an individual is a homosexual is hardly capable of a defamatory meaning."

On the other hand, bestowing this honored designation can be construed as a "hate crime" nowadays if the object of the comment doesn't like its context. Truth has always been a defense against slander or libel charges, but it's just additional evidence against the accused in today's Orwellian "hate" cases.

Note to constitutionalists

Those foolish enough to believe that the Constitution will somehow "save" the United States will be further disheartened to learn that the Supreme Court has just nullified that document's specific provision allowing Congress to limit the court's jurisdiction. Pointedly ignoring a 1937 law barring federal cases involving the "assessment, levy, or collection" of taxes by states, SCOTUS voted 5-4 in June to hear a dispute concerning income-tax credits for Arizona residents who donate money to private schools (Hibbs v. Winn, 02-1809). Because the benefits also accrue to those who give to religious schools, the plaintiffs contend that the law is an unconstitutional promotion of religion.

Counting parasites

According to the Office of Personnel Management, U.S. civilian federal government employment totaled 2.7 million in January of this year. That represents a decrease of 34,473 from a year previous. Some 97.6 percent are in the Executive Branch, 1.3 percent in the Judicial Branch, and 1.1 percent in the Legislative Branch. Only 333,462 are stationed in the District of Columbia. More than two-thirds of the Executive Branch workforce is employed by just four entities — the U.S. Postal Service (780,313), Defense Department (663,380), Veterans Affairs Department (232,172), and Department of Homeland Security (149,258).

There is no middle ground

The most blatant "ethnic cleansing" in the world is taking place today in Zimbabwe, but, because it's whites who are being "cleansed," no one cares. More than 3,000 white farming families have been driven off their land in the past four years. The newest outrage is the case of two Catholic nuns, Sister Helen Maminimini and Sister Notvurgo, who approached a white farming family in 2002 about some land to grow vegetables. The whites obligingly donated 90 acres and their labor for the project, but the nuns became increasingly insistent and aggressive, demanding more land and expensive equipment. In May, they gave the whites 24 hours to get off their land. When the foolish Good Samaritans refused, the place was invaded by squatters, who are making it impossible to operate the farm. It is only a matter of time before the "sisters of mercy" are triumphant in dispossessing the white devils.

In June, the Zimbabwe government announced that it will cancel all titles to productive land, replacing them with 99-year leases to favored individuals. "The state should not waste time and money on acquisitions," declared Lands Minister John Nkomo. "In the end, all land shall be state land."

Another official joke

While all good Last Ditch readers naturally abhor the very idea of a government-issued birth certificate, how many are aware that these documents have become nothing more than fiction — in some cases, science fiction? According to the press, every state but Virginia now automatically issues retroactive birth certificates containing the names of the child's adoptive parents — even when those "parents" are same-sex couples.

Virginia does it routinely, too, but draws the line at the physically impossible combination of two men or two women as parents. The American Civil Liberties Union has now petitioned the Virginia Supreme Court to force the Old Dominion into line, citing the Equal Protection and Full Faith and Credit clauses of the Constitution — the same provisions that judges will be using to institute homosexual marriage nationwide over the next few years.

In a similar case, the parents of the late Edward Araujo, Jr., who considered himself to be "transgendered" and was murdered in his female guise of "Gwen," are asking California to have the name on his birth certificate emasculated posthumously.

Profiles in political courage

Arizona state senator Carolyn Allen (R) resigned her leadership post recently to protest being "forced" to vote on an anti-same-sex marriage bill in an election year. "I'm not going to be bullied. I'm not going to be threatened," the "moderate" complained — about having to make the hard choices that her constituents elected her to make.

The Pennsylvania House of Representatives briefly debated a measure to bar same-sex marriages in late May, but then voted 96-94 to table the matter until after the November 2 election.

June 30, 2004

© 2004 Douglas Olson. All rights reserved.
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